The civilians we killed

Originally appeared December 2, 2004, The Guardian

The chaos of war should never be understated. On the way to Baghdad, I saw bodies by the road, many in civilian clothing. Every time a car got near my Humvee, everyone inside braced themselves, not knowing if gunfire would suddenly erupt out of it. When your enemy is unclear, everyone becomes your enemy. I know the commitment it takes to serve your country, but I also know this war has nothing to do with protecting my country. My sergeant put it best a week before we left for the Middle East: 'Don't think you're going to be heroes. You're not going for weapons of mass destruction. You're not going to get rid of Saddam, or to make Iraq safe for democracy. You're going for one reason, and that's oil.'

War for oil: is a term the troops in Iraq know well. That is the only reason left for this war, leaving those on the ground with only one reason to fight - get home alive. When this kind of desperation sinks in, it is easy to make the person across from you less then human, easier to do horrible things to them.

Did the soldiers who committed those acts in Abu Ghraib view Iraqis as equals? Those who committed these acts will have to live with the memories – just as I wonder how many Iraqi children were killed by my artillery battery, or how many Iraqis were trapped in burning vehicles on the road to Baghdad. These are the thoughts that keep me up at night: the bodies of children and the burned remains of Iraqi troops that couldn't get out in time.

But those who put all of us there will never understand this. That is why they need to be judged. But they will never receive the most just punishment: feeling what myself and all the other veterans of this hideous war will deal with for the rest of our lives.



-- Michael Hoffman took part in the invasion of Iraq as a US marine and is co-founder of Iraq Veterans Against the War ().



» Find more of the online edition.