4-26-05, 9:21 am

Edge of Sports brings to you our annual hoops award ceremony, the 2004-05 Micheal Rays. These awards are first and foremost a response to the numbingly predictable trophies handed out by the NBA. They instead aim to reflect the discussions and debates pro hoops fans actually discuss. The Micheal Rays are named in honor of brilliant early 1980s guard Micheal Ray Richardson. He gets that respect for single-handedly tearing down the NBA's Comeback Player which the league discontinued after suffering the repeated embaressment of giving it to Mr. Richardson following his latest instance of substance abuse. It's that kind of creative destruction we strive for when picking the Micheal Rays

So without further ado...

Best BT [BAAADAAASSS TRANSFORMATION]: Dirk Nowitzki, Dallas Mavericks. Last year, Nowitzki was a seven-foot three point bomber with a bad mullet, who at times seemed allergic to contact, averaging just five trips to the free throw line per game. This year, without the mellow guidance of former teammate Steve Nash, Nowitzki shaved his head and goes to the rim with a fury that would make Neville Chamberlain sign the nearest treaty. If, in years past, Dirk looked like he belonged at a rave, he now resembles a stretched out Ivan Drago. The stats back this up. Dirk now averages 10 free throw attempts and two hard elbows per game.

Best PR [POLITICAL RANT]: Jermaine O'Neal got a ton of publicity for saying that David Stern's dream to deny 18 year olds the chance to enter the NBA was racist.

This made headlines, which are easier to garner when you can drop 55 points on any given night. A lesser heard but politically more incendiary rant was courtesy of the Washington Wizards' Etan Thomas. Thomas plays the kind of hard-nosed hustle game that doesn't show up on a stat sheet but is invaluable to NBA coaches. But if his game is largely anonymous in the roto-fan world, his outspoken politics and skills as a poet set him apart. Below is an excerpt from Thomas' poem against the war in Iraq.

Out of the ashes of Iraq come soldiers dressed in fatigues of fire Wearing helmets secured in smoke They've choked off the lies spewed out of the mouth of a burning bush The true warrior's existing wake Who's flames burned them at the stake Cremated their bodies And stuffed them in an urn wrapped in red, white, and blue.... Rummaging through a forest set ablaze by one lethal match With witty catch phrases forever attached to the side of their kingdom Operation Iraqi Freedom Links to Al Qaeda Eminent threats And weapons of mass destruction..... They've been skillfully thrown into the lion's den Out of the frying pan and into the furnace Their courage exceeds any measuring stick But they can hear the footsteps of death creeping around the corner For they've been led into the eye of the storm Transformed into peacekeepers Lending a helping hand for the poorly planned post-war strategy......

Biggest About Face3 [individual award]: Vince Carter. Has anyone ever had a season like Vince Carter…ever? In Toronto 'Vinsanity' was more like 'Vinny Terranova' - playing like a 'Grade A Wiseguy,' averaging 16 points per game while shooting 41% from the field. After being traded to New Jersey for two tins of toxic waste and a vinyl of Darkness on the Edge of Town, Carter found the Fountain of Middle Age, as his scoring jumped to 28 points per game on 47% shooting, raising two questions: 1 - Has anyone won the most improved player award for shifting their play in the middle of the season? 2 – Should Toronto season ticket holders file a class action lawsuit for his earlier play? Biggest About Face [team addition]: The Nuggets began the season with the highest expectations, after their first playoff appearance in a decade and the signing of free agent Kenyon Martin. This led to the unfortunate statement by Nuggets owner Stan Kroenke who said, 'Last season, we thought we could beat you. This season, we're going to strap it on.' But first under Coach Jeff Bzdelik and then Michael Cooper, the Nuggets, far from producing wins, barely produced a pulse. The team was listless, uninspired and miles from the playoff discussion. Then they brought in the perfectly egg-shaped George Karl, who had spent the previous several months looking antsy doing commentary on ESPN. Karl came into Denver and spun them 180 degrees as they climbed from six games out of the Western Conference's final playoff spot into the seventh seed in a span of 2 1/2 months. The Nuggetswent a staggering 32-8 after Karl took over on January 28 – the best winning percentage (.800) for a coach who took over in midseason -- and won 19 of its final 20 home games, including the last 12. 'It's our attitude, our swagger, the way we approach the game,' Nuggets power forward Kenyon Martin said. 'George's enthusiasm, the way he approaches the game transfers to us. We believe in him and he believes in us.' [translation: nobody believed in poor Jeff Bzdelik.]

Biggest WG (Wilbon Gaffe): We love the Washington Post's Michael Wilbon here at Edge of Sports because he writes in a polemical style that leaves no doubt where he stands on a particular issue. Alas, that also leaves him open to a 'Dewey Beats Truman' level of error. Last year, Wilbon wrote that Allen Iverson was 'over the hill' at age 28, and had taken too many knocks to ever be effective again. It was a compelling argument given the head to toe bruises the little man had taken since his entry into the league in 1996. But this year Iverson had the best season of his career averaging 31 points and career high 8 assists, and unlike Vince Carter, he didn't have to switch teams to do it. Iverson's 8 dimes per game are all the more remarkable given that he was playing with team mates you wouldn't trust in a pickup game at the Y, and then was given late season 'help' in the form of one-legged malcontent Chris Webber (and I'm a Webber fan). Wilbon, to his credit, has come clean and admitted that his tales of Iverson's demise were greatly exaggerated.

Most Sound and Fury Signifying Nothing: LeBron James. Yes, King James. 27 points. 7 boards; 7 assists; no playoffs. AYDY (Ain't you dead yet?): Kevin Willis averaged 3 points and 3 rebounds for the Atlanta Hawks this year. This is the same Kevin Willis who, at 42 years of age, was born when John F. Kennedy was President, and disconcertingly looks exactly the same as when he was playing with Dominique and Doc Rivers on the old Atlanta Hawks; the same Kevin Willis who designed and marketed leather pants in the mid 1980s - which at the time was a very cool thing to do; the same Kevin Willis who still pulls an NBA pay check. God bless him, but when I see KW take the court the question is raised, 'Ain't you dead yet?'



--Dave Zirin's new book 'What's My Name Fool? Sports and Resistance in the United States' will be in stores in June 2005. Check out his revamped website edgeofsports.com. You can receive his column Edge of Sports, every week by e-mailing edgeofsports-subscribe@zirin.com. Contact him at whatsmynamefool2005@yahoo.com.