10-07-05, 10:11 am
Rep. Tom DeLay (TX): Indicted for a second time this past week for money laundering. Cries conspiracy. Oh wait, that’s the charge on his first indictment.
George W. Bush: (a) Tells Palestinian leaders that God told him to invade Afghanistan and Iraq. Says, I’m on a 'mission from God.' Reports of Bush’s conversations with God coincide with reports that he has fallen off the wagon.
(b) After leading a war during which Bush confiscated Iraqi oil and handed the country over to his close friends at Halliburton, Bechtel, ChevronTexaco, and others, and is using the US military to protect profits and political influence, Bush accuses international terrorists of 'endless ambitions of imperial domination.'
(c) Chooses long-time personal friend and political ally Harriet Miers to replace Sandra Day O’Connor on the Supreme Court. Brags that he chose her specifically because she isn’t a judge, has no record, and no experience.
Sen. Rick Santorum (PA): DeLay accomplice whose approval rating in his home state has fallen to 41%. He is currently running 18 points behind his prospective Democratic opponent for 2006 elections. Some say Santorum’s unpopularity results from his rigid hatred of gay people or his distaste for civil rights in general. Others say it’s his extreme position on reproductive rights, such as his claim that birth control harms America. Perhaps it is as simple as the revelation that he had Pennsylvania taxpayers pay for his kids' private schooling while they lived in Virginia.
Nine Republican Senators: Vote against an amendment offered by John McCain to the defense spending bill to ban torture by the US military. More specifically, the amendment requires US military to follow the 'field manual' that existed prior to the shenanigans by the Bush administration, the Pentagon, and the Justice Department that exempted US personnel from following the Geneva Conventions. The 'pro-torture' nine:
Sen. Wayne Allard (R-CO) Sen. Kit Bond (R-MO) Sen. Tom Coburn (R-OK) Sen. Thad Cochran (R-MS) Sen. John Cornyn (R-TX) Sen. James Inhofe (R-OK) Sen. Pat Roberts (R-KS) Sen. Jeff Sessions (R-AL) Sen. Ted Stevens (AK)
Sen. Bill Frist (TN): Majority leader under investigation by the Securities and Exchange Commission for insider trading for selling stock in a company owned by his family valued at millions just before the price collapsed. On the torture amendment, Frist flip-flops: first, he led opposition to McCain's amendment to ban torture by the US military, then he voted for it.
Rev. James Dobson: Right-wing Christian fundamentalist radio personality prematurely endorses Bush Supreme Court nominee Harriet A. Miers contrary to the inclinations of much of the rest of the ultra right. Claims that many members of Congress consulted with him about Bush's choice, and he tells them of his insider knowledge that Miers is ultra right and extreme enough in her religious views to satisfy even the most hard-right Republican. Dobson also claims to have discussed Miers with God. Doesn’t divulge God’s advice.
Terry Nelson: A long-time adviser to Bush and top official in his 2004 campaign who was named in the most recent DeLay indictment as the Republican National Committee official to whom DeLay’s c-conspirators at TRMPAC gave $190,000 in illegal corporate cash to distribute to Texas Republican candidates, a violation of Texas law.
Karl Rove: Returns (fourth appearance) to the grand jury investigating the outing of CIA agent Valerie Plame because of her husband's criticism of Bush’s use of manufactured evidence to pressure Congress into supporting the Iraq war resolution. Receives no offer of immunity from indictment. Hopes are up.
